Tune in Tonight to Claim Your Personal Power and Confidence

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Would you like to know how to claim your personal power and confidence? How do you remain calm, centered and confident no matter what’s going on “out there”? When unspeakable tragedies like the Boston Marathon bombing happen, how do you find your peace of mind?

Please join me today (April 18th at 7PM EST) as I will be interviewed on The Positivity Project, an online speaker series hosted by my friends Katherine Poehnert & Alan Cohen. On this call, we will discuss:

• The 8 Invisible Chaos that keep you fearful, stuck, broke, unhappy, shooting yourself in the foot and beating yourself up over and over
• A powerful 3-step process to help you BE calm, centered and confident when everything is falling apart
• One decision you MUST make to release self-doubt, self-sabotage, pain, anxiety, hidden shame & guilt
• What you can learn about personal power from ancient Taoist wisdom and martial arts
• Why you cannot fully claim your personal power if you try to avoid negative emotions
• A counterintuitive way to claim your personal power

There is no cost to join this call, and if you can’t make the live call, you have 48 hours to listen to the recording. But, I do encourage you to call in LIVE if you can. You can ask me questions right on the call too.

Here’s the link to sign up ~> http://bit.ly/ZiJeKl

Hope to “see” you on the call tonight!

Navigate Change with Grace and Ease

2012 is the Year of the Water Dragon, which occurs every 60 years. From a Feng Shui standpoint, the year of the Water Dragon brings many possibilities for good fortune. In Chinese 5 elements theory, water produces wood, which signifies growth and is the natural element of the dragon. Dragons are the most powerful mystical creatures in the Chinese culture, and legend has it that the emperor that rules the 7 seas is the dragon. In Chinese legend, dragons are shape-shifters, and water shares the same shape-shifting property. Water Dragon personifies creativity at its best. So, you can imagine, the year of the Water Dragon is a powerful year of transformation and there’s no coincidence that 2012 is the Year of the Water Dragon. What does this all mean to you? Great shifts are on the horizon and there’s no escaping from it. If you think last year was tough with a lot of shifts, changes and break-downs, this year will be even more intense! Buckle up and prepare for an exciting ride! Bottom Line: You must learn how to adapt and thrive in change. When you’re faced with change, are you excited and confident? Or, are you stressed, overwhelmed, anxious, fearful, stuck in analysis paralysis, second-guessing themselves, worried excessively and about to snap? I am hosting a FREE Teleseminar tomorrow to teach you how to navigate change with grace, ease, confidence and peace of mind.

Navigating Change with Grace and Ease FREE Teleseminar You will learn: What’s required of you to thrive in the Year of the Water Dragon One critical mindset shift you must make right now The 4 C’s you need to navigate change with grace, ease and confidence The 2 saving grace that will overcome any fears 4 powerful questions to ask yourself when you’re faced with major setbacks 3 mistakes you must avoid if you want to thrive in change How to be victorious despite ANY adversity Date: Tuesday May 15 Time: 1 pm ET (12 pm Central, 10 am Pacific) Cost: there’s no cost to attend *We will record the Teleseminar for you.

For more information and to Sign Up Now visit: http://www.hueinasu.com/navigating-change-call

Is Your Perfectionism Keeping You Stuck?

If you are a high-achiever, you always aim for excellence and achievement. You don’t mind working extra hard, going the extra mile in order to achieve your goals. However, in the name of pursuing excellence, it’s very common for high-achievers to fall prey to perfectionism. There’s a fine line between being excellent and being perfect. The desire to be excellent motivates you to move forward and be the best you can be. On the flip side, the need to be perfect fills you with anxiety and self-doubt, runs you ragged and keeps you stuck.

Your Inner Perfectionist may sound like this:

• I have to be perfect OR ELSE!
• If I’m not perfect, I’m a complete failure.
• People are waiting for me to fail and they will laugh at me.
• I’m not trying hard enough, otherwise I would’ve been perfect.
• Why can’t I pull it off like “everybody else”? What’s wrong with me?
• If I’m not perfect, nobody will love me.
• I can’t afford to make any mistakes.
• I have to be the best in everything I do.
• I’m so afraid of making the wrong choices or wrong moves that I’ve lost confidence in myself.
• If I can’t make it perfect (or, If I’m not sure I can succeed), why do I even bother getting started?
• If I don’t finish it, I won’t have to find out how imperfect (what a loser) I am.

Does it sound familiar? How does reading these statements make you FEEL – physically and emotionally? Do you tend to set impossibly high standards for yourself (and others) and beat yourself up over and over for not reaching your goals? If you feel anxious, frustrated, stuck in analysis paralysis, chest tightening, hyperventilating, paralyzed by fear of failure, with an extra dose of self-doubt or even self-loathing, you are probably a perfectionist. And the higher your aspirations are, the more severely affected you would be by perfectionism. The more successful you are, the more problematic perfectionism would manifest in your life, your health, your relationships and career/business.

Be honest: Is your Inner Perfectionist running you ragged these days? I know, because I’ve been there myself.

Last week I was invited by my Taiwanese sister Andrea J. Lee to speak via video at her 2012 The Wealthy Thought Leader event. Andrea asked me to share my experience in The Keeper of the Keys movie (which I costar with Jack Canfield, John Gray and Marci Shimoff), and offer advice for attendees who are considering a movie project like this in the future.

If you are in the coaching & personal development industry, you’d know it’s a great honor to be included in Andrea’s Wealthy Thought Leader event. Andrea is known for teaching thought leaders on how to stay ahead of the curve, make money AND meaning via innovation. Her annual Wealthy Thought Leader event (it’s her 4th this year) in Vancouver, B.C. always attracts high-caliber speakers and thought leaders from all over the world. So, imagine my joy and surprise when I got a message from Andrea inviting me to share my experience at her event. And since she asked for a video sharing, I don’t even have to worry about flying over there. I was so excited!

There’s only one caveat: I got Andrea’s email on Sunday night, asking me if I can send her my video by Tuesday, or the latest Wednesday (her event starts on Thursday morning).

“Oh, I wish I had more time to work on this!!” my Inner Perfectionist piped up right away.

I assured her, “That’s okay, it’s only a very short video (5 min) and we can make it.” She insisted, “But, Hueina, this is your very first contact with Andrea’s community, and there will be so many accomplished thought leaders there. You want to make a perfect first impression. It’s very important, you know.” Well, first impression IS important. I can’t argue with that!

Then, my Inner Good Girl chimed in, “And Hueina, it’s such an honor that Andrea asked you to do this. It’s important to her and you don’t want to disappoint her.” The Inner Good Girl is the one who always wants to be a “good girl” and do good. She is all concerned about being proper, doing things right and making others happy (often at the cost of her own well-being). I started to feel a little pressure on my chest. Well, I do want to give Andrea and her community a great video that brings value to them; however, I do not want to get stressed out over this.

Been there, done there. Not again.

Instead, my intention was to make this video with JOY and offer it as my gift to Andrea and her community. I wanted to have a little FUN in the process as well (fun is one of my highest core values). Knowing the persuasive power of my Inner Perfectionist, and fully aware of my time constraints, I made a deal with her right off the bat. I told her that I agreed with her that we wanted to present a high-quality video that represents me well, and brings high value for Andrea’s community. On the other hand, I made it clear to her that we needed to stick to my schedule and honor my other business and family commitments (and it goes without saying that I would keep my self-care as well). AND, I wanted to aim for being professional and authentic, NOT perfect.

With the ground rules set, I looked at my business and family schedule, and picked out a couple small blocks of time for this project. I knew I most likely won’t be able to record and edit the video in one sitting. Trying to do everything all at once would probably tire me out. On the other hand, I knew I had to give myself and my Inner Perfectionist a deadline, otherwise I’ll be spending WAY too much time and energy working on “perfecting” the video. Can you relate to this?

So, my Inner Perfectionist and I went to work – first in our head, planning out what we’d like to share based on Andrea’s questions. As it turned out, it’s not easy to condense all I wanted to share in 5 minutes, without feeling rushed or speaking at a frantic pace (that wouldn’t be peaceful or powerful, would it?) The creative in me had so many ideas, and I wouldn’t and couldn’t settle for a boring “talking head” video. So, I decided to include a snippet of The Keeper of the Keys movie trailer, and used a short clip of my segment in the movie to illustrate my point of telling deeply personal story in a powerful way. By the way, that’s how you can connect with the audience, stand out and be memorable.

I was excited by this new idea, so I planned out the video and recorded my speaking part. Next is the editing part – stringing everything together. Of course, every step of the way, my Inner Perfectionist was by my side, relentlessly reminding me to be perfect and fiercely pointing out my flaws. Every time she did that, I thanked her for trying to help and patiently but firmly reminded her the ground rules we’ve agreed on. Reminding myself my intention to bring value instead of trying to create a perfect video really helped. When I used up the time I’ve set for myself to complete this project, I saved the video, and sent it to Andrea right away. She told me she loved the video and they way I’ve designed it, with commentary and snippets of the movie trailer as well as my story. When she showed the video at The Wealthy Thought Leader event last Friday, I got so many praises and accolades from the live audience as well as simulcast attendees. Even days after I still got messages from Facebook thanking me for my sharing.

So, what can you learn from my experience? Here are 7 tips for overcoming perfectionism:

1. When opportunity knocks, you need to take decisively swift action. Successful people are action-takers. The rule of thumb is, ALWAYS SAY YES first, then figure out how to get it done.

2. Set a clear intention before you commit to or start a new project. What do you intend to achieve as the end result? (hint: aim for anything but absolute perfection.) Also, what do you intend to experience in the process and as a result of this project? For example, joy, fun, connecting with others, learning something new, making a difference, feeling proud of yourself, etc.

3. Set a clear time frame for you to work on the project. This is for you if you have a tendency to not finish your project, procrastinate like crazy, or spend FOREVER trying to make it perfect.

4. Before you start anything, set ground rules for yourself and your Inner Perfectionist, and firmly reinforce these rules. In my coaching, I teach my clients specific ways to communicate with their Inner Perfectionists and turn them into helpers, not tyrants who boss them around until they are totally run down.

5. Acknowledge and praise yourself for your efforts and progress (no matter how little), not just the end result. Practice loving kindness and Intensive Self-Care.

6. Know that your Inner Perfectionist (with her magnifying glass and white cotton gloves) is probably the only one who can see your flaws. To other people, you are probably quite amazing.

7. Remember, good enough is good enough. If you are offering something (be it your words or gifts of any kind), as long as it’s from your heart and you have done your best, it’s more than good enough.

So there you have it. My 7 tips for overcoming perfectionism. There’s no extra charge for the typos.

Here’s the video I shared at The Wealthy Thought Leader event, which included snippets of The Keeper of the Keys movie trailer and MY segment in the movie. Check it out!!

If the video player does not work, use this link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nt10J1VljxE

P.S. If you are stumped by perfectionism, you might have other Invisible Chaos too! Sign up for my FREE Claim Your Peaceful Power Success Activation Kit and learn how to tame your Invisible Chaos for lasting inner peace, joy and true confidence.

P.P.S. You can order The Keeper of the Keys DVD on my website here.

Passion and Purpose – Why I Almost Went Postal

There’s nothing like a birthday that makes you pause and reflect on your life. One particular memory stood out for me this year. It was March 21, 2005, just a few days before my birthday. My husband Carey and I officially swore in and became U.S. citizens. It was a long process and so much preparation went into getting our citizenship. So on this day, we were both excited and happy that our efforts had finally paid off, and that we would reap the benefits of better future and more opportunities for us and our children.

On our way home, we were both in high spirit. That’s when it happened.

My husband turned to me and said, “Now that you’ve got your citizenship, you can get a government job, like the post office.” I couldn’t believe what I just heard! I felt my blood was reaching the boiling point, yet I was SO mad that I couldn’t utter a word. Even with my “death stare”, dear hubby seemed totally oblivious (typical man). He continued, “well, you know, you can also consider the bank. They are always hiring tellers.” OUCH! That really hurt my feelings!

You see, I gave up my career as a college counselor when my daughter was about one year old, and my son was born about 2 years later. I was a stay-at-home-mom for a couple years, then started a home-based business and doing freelance jobs. Back in 2005, I had stayed home with our two young children for a few years, and Carey had asked me several times when I would return to work (i.e. a full-time J.O.B.). After staying home for a few years, I wasn’t sure what career I wanted to pursue, and I wasn’t confident that I could return to my previous career. Let’s face it, being a stay-at-home-mom is not a confidence-booster for career-minded high-achieving women. Besides, I wanted to find something that would allow me to work around my children’s schedules. So, a regular 9-to-5 J.O.B. wouldn’t no longer work. I did not want to settle. After months of soul-searching, I still had no clarity about my career path. Until my dear friend Heather told me about life coaching, and I eventually enrolled in iPEC Coaching and became a Certified Empowerment Coach.

On the day I got my citizenship, I was just enrolled in the coaching school. I was so excited about my future career – one that I feel combines my past education, training and experience in nursing, counseling and healing people. So imagine my surprise when dear hubby suggested I find a job at the post office!

To be frank, if it wasn’t because he was driving the car, I would’ve most definitely kicked him where it hurt MOST. And believe me, as a Black Belt in Tae Kwan Do, I have a powerful kick!!

After fuming for a while (you know how women are), I finally blurted out, “I can’t believe you said that!!! Post office? Why don’t I get a job as a grocery store cashier then?” I felt humiliated and hurt. He didn’t believe in me. I didn’t moved all the way from Asia to get my master’s degree, just to end up sorting mails here.

No offense to postal workers. It’s an important and respectable job. It’s just not something that’s aligned with my passion, purpose or talents. I know I’ll become bored and resentful very quickly, and it might just kill what little self-confidence I had left.

The last thing I wanted was to settle and compromise myself. And I’m so glad I didn’t. I became a Certified Empowerment Coach, best-selling author and international keynote speaker. I get to do what I love and make a difference in the world every day. My children, now 16 and 14, are amazing young people and very close to me because I’ve been home with/for them. And my husband Carey has become my biggest fan. Now he totally believes in my vision and support my work in so many ways. I’m truly grateful for him!

How about you? Are your life and work aligned with your passion, purpose and talents? Is your job feeding your soul, or draining your life force?

If you are currently at a job that depletes you, ask yourself why. Are you staying at this job because you are not sure what you really want? Or is it because of fear (fear of failure, fear of success, fear of the unknown etc)? Are you settling because you think that’s being responsible to your family, or, are you using your family as an excuse not to pursue your dream?

Oftentimes we feel that we have to be responsible to our family, at the cost of our own well-being and happiness. Self-sacrifice, as I wrote in my Amazon bestseller Intensive Care for the Nurturer’s Soul, is a virtue for many people, especially heart-centered women. It’s also a surefire way to Self-Care Deficiency Syndrome, a host of physical, emotional and relationship problems. Let me give you a reframe here. If you are sacrificing your core values and well-being, you are not being responsible to yourself – your higher self. Of course, being a parent, some sacrifice and compromises are required. There is constant give-and-take in marriage too. But, there is a difference between healthy give-and-take and complete sacrifice of your happiness, core values, well-being and even who you are. Can you tell the difference?

So, if you are currently at a job that depletes you, what’s the first step you can take to move toward a career that’s more aligned with WHO you are and give you more JOY? Maybe it’s getting clear on what you really want. Maybe you need to take classes or learn new skills for your new career. Maybe you need to polish your resume. Maybe you need to block out time to write or start your business. Or even just allow yourself 10 minutes to daydream. No matter how tiny a baby step you can take, do it. Begin today.

If you need some ideas and action steps for successful midlife career change, check out my audio CD “Changing Lanes: Secrets of Successful Midlife Career Change” on my website. You will learn:

• 4 myths that lead to job dissatisfaction
• 4 mistakes people make in career change
• how to decide whether to stay or change your career
• what you must look for in your new career to ensure your happiness
• the proactive steps to take for a successful midlife career change

If you are stuck in analysis paralysis, you might also love “Effortless Decision-Making Strategies for the Indecisive“ which teaches you:

• the underlying reasons why you are indecisive
• 3 questions you can ask yourself when you’re stuck
• the 10-second technique to bring clarity in decision-making
• one critical factor to ensure better decision-making and less regrets for you
• tips and tools to help you make up your mind so you can move forward

All my books, CDs & movie DVDs are available here: www.HueinaSu.com/store. Today is the LAST day of my birthday celebration sale. Everything is 20% off (use Coupon Code 201203). Plus, if your order total is $50 or more (after the 20% discount) you will also receive a copy of The Venus Evolution Global Telesummit MP3 recordings ($77 value).

If you need further support through coaching, I’m here for you. Simply drop me an email at info [at] HueinaSu.com with the subject line “coaching consult” and I will send you the details.

No matter where you are on your journey, I wish you a year filled with JOY and fulfilling success!

HERO or HERD?

The other day, my son forgot his alto saxophone and asked me to bring it to school for him. Since he doesn’t normally forget his stuff, I brought it to him. On my way home from school, the license plate on the car right in front of me caught my attention. In all capital letters the license plate reads “THEHERD.” Quickly I snapped a picture of it with my iPhone.

My first impression was “THE HERO“, and I thought to myself: How fitting…. Think about all the things we do as parents, every single day, for our children. While most are mundane and even trivial, some of the stuff we do are nothing short of heroic. We do it willingly, and we don’t need a medal or a fancy Batmobile, either. I felt a deep sense of pride, thinking “I’m a SHERO who drives a minivan.”

When I got home and had a closer look at the picture, I realized that the license plate reads “THE HERD“, not “THE HERO.” The capital D looks like O from a distance. Haha! Obviously I could use a stronger prescription for my contact lens.

How abut you? What did you see at first glance? THE HERO or THE HERD?

Then it dawned on me that this was yet another “Message from the Universe” for me.

You see, I often receive signs and messages from the Universe through license plates, songs on the radio, animals, message from other people, etc. The messages are often timely and profound. Of course, the more I learn to pay attention, the more messages I receive.

In this case, I was thinking about writing an article on courage the night before, and there it was, right in front of me, “THE HERO” in big, bold capital letters!!

Of course, I know what you’re thinking: “But it says THE HERD, not THE HERO on the license plate! You read it wrong!”

Did I?

I believe that we have a way of seeing what our heart (or Soul, or the Universe) wants us to see, if we are being open and present enough. There’s no doubt in my mind why I was seeing THE HERO instead of THE HERD. For one, I’d rather be a HERO (or I should say SHERO) for my children, instead of someone who just herds them around town. I want to be someone who fiercely protects them, stands up for them, and be a good role model for them.

Same for my own life. I’d rather be a HERO on my own journey, blazing my own path, taking whatever risks to live my destiny. I’m no longer willing to keep my head down, silence my voice, compromise my values, conform to rules and expectations that are not aligned with my true self, or stay faceless, voiceless and powerless in a HERD on a beaten path leading AWAY from my soul’s purpose. You might think it’s safer to say in a HERD. There’s safety in numbers, right? Not necessarily.

Every time you do things that are against your values, every time you ignore that quiet whisper from the core of your being, or give up your voice and your self-respect, in order to play safe, to please others, to avoid being judged, rejected or ridiculed, you are giving up a small piece of your true self. You are slowly but surely killing your Soul. It is painful not knowing your purpose in life. It’s even MORE painful when you know, deep in your Soul, what your calling is, why you are here in this lifetime, yet for whatever reason you are denying it, turning away from it, standing by the sideline and not able to LIVE it.

I saw very clearly this kind of suffocating anxiety and soul-murdering angst in quite a few entries in my ONE DECISION Challenge in the past week. Most of them know their life purpose and why they want to achieve their goals. Their goals are all different and personal. However, when asked what’s keeping them from living their purpose and reaching their goals, their answers were awfully similar: Lack of courage, confidence, self-esteem, self-worth, self-discipline, accountability and/or know-how. I can totally relate, because just a few short years ago, I was there. Lost. Paralyzed by fears. Feeling powerless. Filled with anxiety, guilt, shame and self-loathing. Now I’m crystal clear why I’m here and I’m on the right path.

It takes tremendous courage to go after your dream, to stand up for what you believe, to speak your truth, to be a leader, or, just to be YOU. You might have a vision to inspire and serve a certain population, to make a change or a difference through your business. You might have a personal goal of creating a better life for yourself and your family. Maybe you wish to be a role model for your children, or for your parents to be proud of you. Or, maybe you just want to feel good in your own skin and finally be at peace with who you truly are.

No matter what your goal is, it requires you to muster up your courage and take a stand. It requires you to be the HERO on your own journey, instead of staying in the HERD. What do you stand for? Who/what will you fiercely protect and defend? What are you willing to invest (time, money, energy, hard work)? What are you willing to risk and sacrifice?

The more important question is: WHO will you be? THE HERO or THE HERD? It’s time for you to make a choice.

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